When you are disabled you want to try to be as independent as possible. Being independent makes it so you can do many things by yourself. There are a number of reasons why independence is important, and I will explain why.
Embarrassment- When you are a young disabled child and can’t do that much for yourself you don’t face this problem as much. When I was in preschool there was a teacher that wanted to do everything for me. My mom noticed and said to me whenever I can do something by myself to tell her “I can do that all by myself” that way we wouldn’t cause any issues with that teacher. I am grateful that my mom was like that because I would not be the person I am today if she wasn’t. I would probably be very lazy and not know how to do very many things on my own if my mom didn’t push me when I was younger. If you don’t start young chances are it will be very difficult to change. Learning how to do as many tasks on your own as possible will be very helpful when you are out with friends because then you won’t have to worry about getting embarrassed or needing a companion everywhere you go!
Having everyone be your slave- There are some disabled people who are just plain lazy and want everyone to do everything for them. The reason you shouldn’t do everything for a disabled person is that they become dependent on other people and can’t do anything by themselves. If a disabled person legitimately needs help yes, you should help them but I wouldn’t encourage you to be their slave because you are actually doing them a disservice. You have to start independence at a young age if you start giving a disabled child whatever they want once they get older it’s too late. Most of the time once they get to the point of everyone doing everything for them, chances are they will expect it and not be pleasurable to be around. Do yourself a favor and teach your disabled child everything you can so they don’t get like that.
Not asking for help when you need it- There are times when a very independent person will need help, but they need to know when the appropriate time to ask for help is. If you can do something by yourself especially if you’re disabled, you want to do it because a lot of the time there isn’t that much a disabled person can do unassisted. Don’t ask for help if you don’t need it. Some people will constantly ask if you need help. They are just trying to be nice and helpful, don’t be rude answer honestly.
Moving out is difficult- If you are completely dependent on someone else moving out is very difficult. Why? Because you have to hire a bunch of people to come to take care of you because you don’t know how to do or unable to do it yourself. So if you can help it learn how to do as many tasks as you can. There are some disabled people who are completely dependent on other people and I am not speaking to those people. A lot of times the people you hire are not very reliable so if you can avoid it. you want to. If that is not an option, there is nothing you can do about it.
Independence is very important if you have a disability. People will totally understand if you need help with something and gladly assist you, but don’t take advantage of them. You are only hurting yourself. If you have questions regarding independence, please leave them in the comments below!
Life with Spina Bifida is a personal blog that is all about my life with a disability, chronic pain as well as encouraging hope and positivity for those who are suffering. You are not alone!