Over the course of my life people have said a few rude remarks that some people may find helpful but actually, it’s very insulting. I will share with you some of the remarks that have been said to me over time so you can avoid saying these things.
You should consider speech therapy-I have a speech delay meaning some words are difficult for me to say. Telling me I should consider speech therapy is rude and not helpful. If you don’t understand something I have said just ask me to repeat it don’t tell me I should consider speech therapy. Saying comments like this has only made me extremely self-conscious of the way I talk, so please don’t make remarks like this!
Speech therapy obviously didn’t work- Actually, it did work! When I was a child I had way more difficulty with saying some words than I do now. Before you make remarks like this, have your facts straight!
What country are you from?- I was born and raised in Florida! Most people say this comment because they didn’t understand what I said and they think by telling me I have an accent I will take that as a compliment. If you don’t understand what I said just ask me to repeat it, I won’t be offended.
You are a failure if you drop out of school- I tried to take a college course and made the mistake of telling someone who I thought would be supportive but actually did the total opposite. She said if I dropped out of school I was a total failure. Dropping out of college does not make you a failure because not everyone is cut out for college I know I wasn’t. My learning disability made it difficult for me to pass those courses than it would be for a person with no disability. Before you make a remark like this think about what you’re saying.
Your just lazy- I cannot tell you how many times people have come up to me and told me that I would have a job if I tried harder. Saying comments like this is rude because you don’t know how many applications I have put in to try to get a job. Telling me I am just terrible at interviewing is not helpful, it’s actually insulting! Unless you are the one interviewing me, you can’t judge my interviewing skills because there are a lot of disabled people who have the same problem! My problem is not from lack of effort it’s from unaccepting society.
When you have a disability people will say remarks that are rude and uncalled for. How you handled it is the most important thing you can do. Getting really angry in my opinion is a waste of energy because chances are they will keep doing it. If an abled person does something that really upsets you, you can let them know that so they don’t keep doing it. I suggest you calmly tell them first if they upset you instead of screaming at them. People tend to shut down when they are being yelled at. If you have any questions about rude remarks that have made me mad please leave them in the comments below!
Life with Spina Bifida is a personal blog that is all about my life with a disability, chronic pain as well as encouraging hope and positivity for those who are suffering. You are not alone!