Sometimes an abled person may say things to a disabled person because they think they are funny but a disabled person may not see it that way and may be very offended. In a previous post, I talked about things you should never say to a handicapped person but since there are so many things you should never say to a handicapped person I thought I would add some more.
Your not disabled your differently abled- There is nothing wrong with using terms like differently abled if that is how the individual prefers to identify themselves but don’t tell someone how they should identify themselves so you can feel more comfortable around them. If the individual does not prefer to identify themselves as differently abled then out of respect don’t refer to them in that way.
If I was disabled I don’t think I could carry on living- Thanks for telling me my life is not worth living! People with disabilities may have difficulties with some things but that does not mean their lives are not worth living and you should never tell anyone that whether they are disabled or abled. Some disabled people suffer from depression and if you make them feel like there life is not worth living they may start to have thoughts of suicide. A person who is not suffering from depression may just ignore comments like this but someone who is may take it more seriously. Every life is worth living and, don’t ever make someone feel like it isn’t!
Just be positive it’s all in the mind- Please don’t say ever say this to a disabled person! Most disabilities have no cure so it doesn’t matter how positive your mindset is it won’t cure you of your disability. It really shows your level of stupidity when you say things like this so if you want to sound intelligent then just don’t! What is normal anyways if you ask me it’s a setting on your dryer!
How do you go to the bathroom?- Questioning how someone goes to the bathroom is rude. Some disabled people get offended by this because you are implying that they have trouble managing basic tasks. Some disabled people have trouble going to the bathroom but that is not the case for everyone. If a disabled person feels comfortable talking about their bathroom regime then they will bring it up if not then it’s none of your business.
You have had a lot of surgeries what are you doing wrong?– Blaming me for causing a medical problem is rude. Even though you may not understand why these problems are occurring that does not make it okay for you to blame me for causing them. Unless you have some kind of proof that shows me that I caused a medical problem then it is not your place to say comments like that! (your gut is not proof) When I am having a medical issue I am more stressed than usual and placing blame just causes more stress!
Sometimes abled people say things to disabled people because they think they are being helpful but if they really thought about some of the things they were saying they may realize some of these things are not helpful. In fact most of these things disabled people find very offensive or hurtful so you want to try and refrain from saying them. I could go on and on about things you should never say to a disabled person but the bottom line is before you say something, think about what you’re saying. Is it hurtful? Is it personal? If you are ever unsure of whether a question could be considered rude or insensitive you are better off not asking! Are there any questions you are unsure if you should ask a disabled person? Leave them in the comments below and I will be more than happy to let you know if these questions are appropriate or not! If you have not read part one and would like to you can find it here: https://sarahlynn358.com/2017/08/06/things-you-should-never-say-to-a-handicapped-person/
Life with Spina Bifida is a personal blog that is all about my life with a disability, chronic pain as well as encouraging hope and positivity for those who are suffering. You are not alone!